Since my last entry, I have started noticing some changes that come in life with kids. One that has been particularly evident is dating. With 4 kids and Scott's work schedule we don't get to go out very often but with the birthdays this week we did get to go out and it sparked some memories of how things used to be. Let me preface this by saying that this is in no way complaining about my current situation. It is merely an observation on how things change in life. Change is not always a bad thing.
I remember dating in high school or college. I did date and enjoyed going out with friends. I remember the routine would shape almost the whole day. I would set aside at least 2 hours to get ready. I would take a long, hot shower and never forget to shave my legs. I would plan out what I was going to wear. Make sure it fit just right and looked good, even ironing if necessary. Then I would move onto the hair and make-up. That always took time. The hair had to be styled just right and then hair sprayed so it stayed throughout the evenings activities. The make-up took time. I always used foundation and then the rest of the necessary products. Don't forget the coordinating accessories of jewelery and the perfume. You never went out without smelling good. As my father so eloquently put it, "How can the bee find the flower if he can't smell it?"It took time but was always worth the effort. Then whoever it was would come and pick me up. We would have a great time. The hardest thing would be to try to keep the conversation going so there weren't any awkward silences. Then he would drop me then if I was lucky, I would get a goodnight kiss out of the deal.
Fast forward a decade or so.
Going on a date is a delicate balancing act. The hardest part is trying someone to watch 4 kids. Not that I think my kids are naughty or anything. That is just a lot of kids to put someone. Usually I trade with a friend but that isn't quite fair if they only have 1 or 2 kids. It gets a little tricky. Sometimes I get really lucky and someone will volunteer to take them so I can go out for my birthday or something. The whole getting ready routine is completely different. I have to make dinner and I try to take a quick shower while the kids are eating. Who has time to shave their legs? Mind you there is usually someone running into the bathroom to use the toilet while I am in the shower. It doesn't matter that we have 2 other bathrooms and they are all closer than mine. Then I have to tackle the closet. I try to find something thatfits and is clean and not too wrinkly because I never have time to iron. It is also a good thing if I bought it sometime after the first 2 kids were born. If I am lucky I get to put on some eyeliner, eyeshadow and mascara. That takes about 2 minutes and I just let my hair air dry. I don't even own hairspray anymore. Then I have to get the diaper bag packed and the kids in the car. I drop them off and then go pick up Scott from work. He never gets done before 7:00. If I remember, I may but on some smelly lotion in the car before Scott gets in. Who needs prefume? Then there is the issue of what to do. We rarely get to see a movie because, lets face it, we don't want to burden our friends with 4 extra kids for longer than is necessary. We usually end up going out to eat. It is really nice to sit at a restaurant and only worry about what I am going to order. While we are waiting for the food to come we welcome the silence. By this point in the day, we are both tired. I end up looking at the kids at the other tables and missing my own, not that I want them there. It seems like we can't go on a date that doesn't end up at the grocery store or Wal-mart. Really, it is quite nice to go there without kids. Then I drop Scott off back at work so he can get his car and I go and pick up the kids. Now, if I am lucky, I don't get a call in the middle from the sitter telling me that someone is bleeding or otherwise incapacitated. And on the way home, the little ones fall asleep. Although, we don't have to say goodbye at the door and we can always watch a movie once the kids are in bed.
Life just marches on. Ready or not. I just thought that it was kind of funny how much it can change without even realizing it. I love my kids and husband and wouldn't trade them for anything.
2 days ago